ps : i heart you ♥

trials is just next monday. i havent really been studying much and trials is supposed to be important. but there is too much in mind now. even if i would have picked up a book and read, i will get it but there is alot in my mind.

it had always been the time that i should once and for all clear youu out of my mind.

as much as i am saying that i like youu, i dont talk to youu. we dont communicate as we used to when we were friends. i mean we still are but we are just not talking like we used to.

even last time a small minor problem youu are facing, youu would come up to me and ask for my opinion. how i think about it or how youu should do to make things right.

now, none of this had ever happened. i know its because of the college life in a way but i didnt even dare to spend time talking to youu about anything.

and i am not going to tell youu how i felt at any point of time. but i would at least hope that i have the guts to communicate with youu like i did before.

i am going to make this sound like what i did to youu cause its what i treasured about youu last year. youu may know who youu are. but just act as though youu dont. if youu didnt notice, it would be even better.

i missed all of it.

• the day we had a party and youu look like a lost kid which needed his friends. i knew it that day when youu asked for my help to get rid off her, that was the day i couldnt say no to youu. i would try my best to help dont matter what.

• the stories that youu told me about how your relationship worked out but mainly i was just wanting to talk to youu more.

• the days where i would stand at the walk way on the left side of the gate just to hear youu talk and just to say bye.

• smsed youu practically everyday and everytime it started by "heyy, what r doing?''

• convinced youu to go study together in school.

• waking youu up early in the morning cause youu said youu want to study.

youu've walked together with me through my spm month. i know youu have not noticed how much you've helped but i did.

i had adore youu in every single possible angle that i could. your eyes, your smile, your laughters, your words, and youu yourself.

and also the way youu look so high upon yourself in such a cute way. your goofy cute look and the hot sexy look. your eyes is enough to make me feel like i was sleeping on a water bed.

but i was always just an observer. never been the used of those looks.

all this had always been only about me. i dont expect anything.

and now, i should let it all go. i should stop having the word youu in my blog anymore. it should all stop.

i am tired already. tired of standing beside youu and act as though i dont like youu. i am tired of it.

dont worry about it, i am giving up. i was just another secret admirer of yours and now i wont be anymore.

with lots of love,
shereena.