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  1. i love dreams.

    Thursday, July 31, 2008

    you'll just keep me here waiting.

    i wish i dont have to wake up from that dream. dream were always perfect and it seemed happy.

    i just dreamt about youu. i didnt want to wake up on youu. omg la. the feelings is definately more than the one i had before. much more than what i can tell.

    how i wish i could just scream out loud to youu about how i felt so it would make me feel better. this is suffering, its torture! as much as i wish, i dont have the guts the even say anything to youu.

    college was normal. only normal.

    my mum wants to read my blog. i might take all this off a while. i know she wouldnt mind but i dont want to create stuff.


    music addiction : Zetta Bytes - When the Rain Falls

  2. eff it.

    Wednesday, July 30, 2008

    alone by myself.

    college was fine. its vincent's birthday today soo happy birthday vincent! we classmates had a small gathering at pizza hut for lunch but we were so late for physics. 20 minutes late so teacher marked us absent.

    then early in the morning, 2 periods of english was cancelled. we should have came at 10 instead. so me jia shen and khai shien had mcdonalds for breakfast. i thought i lost my wallet. damn blardy scary la!

    what the hell la? i dont want to see you la. argh! annoying.

    is friends always with benefits? do you always make friends just to have those benefits? benefits like making them apart of your problem then once things are solved you just leave them there?

    instead when they need some help none were there. eff it la. friends my ass! might as well just live in a world of yourself rather than having those freaking leaches on you.

    had a small talk with dickson yesterday. he made me emo-er. sometimes youu are everything to me but sometimes i felt like i wasnt even a small part of youu.

    i can feel that there is nothing in between me and youu but the term friends and nothing more. i just wanted youu to at least make the effort to care. just that little thing i am asking for.

    no one is there at all. the only thing that kept me going is the thoughts of youu. none cared, none bothers. so be it.

    sher xoxo.

    music addiction : Delta Goodrem - In This Life

  3. people dont care.

    Tuesday, July 29, 2008

    tears i've shed for youu.

    college was not bad. because i hardly felt like i was studying due to lecturers that let us out early for all most every class.

    and it was miss geetha's last day because she's going for her maternity leave. we had this small celebration for her in class.

    the conversation we had in class was funny. you should really hear what our classmates talk about jia shen. hahaha! dont blame me. it is amusing!

    i thought i didnt had the chance for what i wanted. because instead of it, i am seeing you for like too many times than before and too near than before. and thats not what i wanted. at the moment i thought i might lose it...

    and i got it. youu, there are too many words for me to say about youu. but i dont know who or what should i say them to. no one seems to bother at all.

    why do i even bother telling in the first place? i thought people would care at least. but i guess i was wrong. maybe it didnt matter to any of you. i felt as though it was just a very cold response to keep me from telling anything to any of you.

    i might as well just keep it in me. all i want is youu to talk to. now, youu are the only one that kept me strong.

    youu make me wake up everyday with a smile and thoughts that i know wont be real but yet it is enough to lie to myself and make me happy.

    with love,
    sher xoxo.

    music addiction : Snow Patrol - Signal Fire

  4. ps : i like youu.

    Monday, July 28, 2008

    its youu that i meant.

    yesterdays night out to pyramid was great. thats because i managed to buy stuffs. remember the list of stuffs i want to get? i can strike off one already.

    so this is what is left.

    • still that pair of nike sport shoes. the white with blue colour.
    • a tshirt from catch up.
    • a watch from vincci accessories.
    • a long heart locket necklace.
    • stuffs from la senza. maybe.
    • still that top from mng. maybe.
    • still a pair of wedges heels. maybe.

    but too bad i only bought 3 from dorothy perkins. the one i wanted the most sudah tak ada size! left all the damn big size only.

    still... i got 3 tshirts. and i am happy cause i love the colours! and its comfortable.

    isetan having sales. i want to go klcc la...

    youu, to me you are worth my time waiting. maybe i did take it too seriously. but precaution is always better than cure. i want to let youu know the truth but i cant. dont matter how much i've thought about us, nothing paid off.

    lots of love,
    sher xoxo.

    music addiction : Hilary Duff - Someone's Watching Over Me

  5. fear.

    Sunday, July 27, 2008

    i fear i'll lose youu someday.

    youu, it is so hard for me to actually talk to youu and act as though there is nothing. as much as i want to tell youu, but i cant. words dont seem to come out of my mouth to tell youu the truth.

    i've been hearing the song over and over again. it speaks how i feel at this exact moment.






    sang by eric 林健辉.

    i find him damn cute la. he became that new guy that songs i like to hear from.

    he is a good singer and a malaysian!

    sher xoxo.

    music addiction : 原来我最爱的人是你不是他 - 林健辉

  6. had amali today. sien like shit la.

    my only partner during the talk.

    the stupid class*

    the only stuff i brought*

    i hate it that i was there alone. the fella even said that i didnt pay attention to him but paying attenttion to my handphone. i was there for the sake that it was a procedure only. thats all!

    damn alot of malay there la. me dont likey.

    tomorrow i'll be out for shopping to get my clothes from dorothy perkins. i wonder whether i'll get all four or not.

    i want new clothes. hehe.

    youu, were the only one i was wandering about during the lectures today. youu've made me draw one whole page about youu in that notebook and also some lines that i wrote about youu. i was so tempted to message youu but it was just too hard to even press the word HI.

    youu make me too scared. thats because i dont want to lose youu at any time.

    i am looking for this song and the lyrics. 原來我最愛的人是你不是他. the song somehow tells me things about youu.

    and eric 林健輝 is damn blardy cute la. and his singing is soo good.

    music addiction : Avril Lavigne - Keep Holding On

  7. happy thoughts.

    Friday, July 25, 2008

    i'll reach up for youu. i'll try my best.

    maybe youu were a good choice of me. i dont know why when i had my eyes on youu, i cant let my eyes off youu. every single day, she tend to like youu more.

    went to pyramid today! yay! i finally found a way to go out. actually wanted to go with qi hong, but he had futsal match and steph was available so i dragged her with me.

    and her mum was so kind to fetch me from taylors to pyramid. thank you puan evelyn!

    we went to watch hellboy today. i find it nice ler. dont know why people say not nice. but i like it. the prince nuada is kinda yeng when he is with his spear. only the back view is yeng. when it shows his face, yerr... scary!

    and i also like the part where hellboy killed the tree like thing. i dont know what it is called. its fluid turn into greeneries. very preetty ler.

    my outing today was fruitful. i bought a pair of three quarter jeans from nichii. it took me damn blardy long to decide whether should i buy or not. it was 60 bucks. a hole in my wallet.

    actually, the trip to pyramid today was to get that pair of flat sandals from vincci. but stupid la.. no more size already. everywhere also no size. i like that sandals la!!

    but.. i still want all this.

    • four tops from dorothy perkins. now i want four. haha!
    • still that pair of nike sport shoes. the white with blue colour.
    • a tshirt from catch up.
    • a watch from vincci accessories.
    • a long heart locket necklace.
    • stuffs from la senza. maybe.
    • still that top from mng. maybe.
    • still a pair of wedges heels. maybe.

    i cant have the flat sandals from vincci and the flat pumps from everlast nowadays dont attract me. it is sales thats why i have to buy stuff. if not i wont go so desperate to buy stuff.

    college today was funny. especially with jia shen and wei ping. and today was actually quite good. i dont know why but i felt great today. maybe it is that feeling of being able to go out today. =D

    with love,
    sher xoxo

    music addiction : Rihanna - Cry

  8. love like this.

    Thursday, July 24, 2008

    i am missing youu. but none is youu. makes me miss youu more.

    dont know why this time i am getting worst on to handling stuffs like this. as qi hong said, this is by far the worst. i dont know why i am not as strong as i used to be already. i feel so weak this time. getting so emo for nothing!

    i want those stuff la. mum said it was okayy to buy. so i got an approval. just that i need to go out! i want to go hang kai...

    anybody can teman me go? i'll pay your parking ticket. =D or anything. haha! can we go tomorrow after class?

    maybe it was a good thing today. i've never felt better since monday. the eyes and the smile and the everything. in my dreams...

    lots of love,
    sher xoxo.

    music addiction : Pussycat Dolls - Stickwitu

  9. my needs.

    Wednesday, July 23, 2008

    why la? why do this to me?

    i am seeing you too much la weih.. when i wanted to before i can hardly catch a glance of you. now i dont want to, i see you nearly everywhere. and i am feeling guilty for saying this. you actually look kinda hot in all white. but thats it!

    i am soo afraid when it comes to youu. so afraid till i might burst out into tears.

    college was normal today. apart from a lil bad things here and there. other than that, it was just average.

    i want alot of things la now. but i am nearly broke, how to get what i want la? even if i have the money, how to go through my mum?

    i want ini semua. but... tak boleh dapat.

    • two tops from dorothy perkins
    • a pair nike shoe. its white with BLUE colour
    • a pair of wedges heels
    • a pair of flat pumps from everlast
    • a pair of flat sandals from vincci
    • and... one top from mng

    i want i want. who so kind can buy for me? haha. kidding. i NEED to save money!

    and there are three birthdays next month. how to save? how to save you tell me? eating less might work but... hungry la!

    with love,
    sher xoxo

    music addiction : Innuendo - Belaian Jiwa

  10. its the truth.

    Tuesday, July 22, 2008

    whenever i start to not care and dont feel like having a glance of you, i see you everywhere. and people starts telling me about you.

    is it always like that? the more you dont want something to happen, the more it happens?

    had a talked with adrian. i guess whatever he said was very true. it seems that mostly of whatever he said made so much sense.

    i wouldnt say i am letting youu go, because i wont so easily. but i should learn to take things lighter. life is alot more than just youu. but, youu will always be in me.

    there will be another 4 months till SAM is over for me. i am worried i wont do well. and i have only 4 months in taylors, 2 months to brush up, 4 months till leaving college for good.

    thinking about the finals is very very scary. and i hate it!

    youu, i'll let things lose. but in a way, i'll still hold youu in my hands.

    sher xoxo.

    music addiction : Teddy Geiger - For You I Will

  11. today is a new start. i dont have to go all over looking for you. worrying about whether i'll see you today or not. never even mention anything about you. so yeahh i had let those crushes go.

    it was a good start. finally seeing youu with more emotions and feelings. wont lose any chance or any possiblity to see youu.

    i started things by wearing skirt for the first time to college. everyone needs a new change and so do i.

    now, when i actually had only one youu in mind, i felt lighter. your smile enlightens my day.

    college was kinda good today. i dont know why but i felt great. apart from working through those tonne of work. when a person feels good, everything seems good.

    yours truly, sher xoxo

    music addiction : Franky J & Baby Bash - Obsession

  12. my good friend.

    Sunday, July 20, 2008

    stayed at home the whole day because it seems the group study wasnt on. and it was just another normal sunday.

    i watched my best friend's wedding. the show is abit old but yet i like watching it. featuring julia roberts and cameron diaz. its funny and lovey.

    watching it tells me something about youu. maybe one day i'll see youu in that way. having to let go youu just to make youu happy.

    last time i let youu go because it didnt work out nor made me feel any happier. apart from, getting to see youu with those crappy jokes of yours and that blurness and cuteness in youu that plants a great smile on me. but yet i thought i was wise enough to just give up.

    and now youu just cant stop making me go crazy over youu. even at the times before when i just treated youu as a friend, i still thought youu were hot. and youu still are.

    going out for a birthday party later but i still have tonnes of work not done. can i not go to college tomorrow?

    sher xoxo.

    music addiction : David Cook - Always be my baby

  13. a final thought of my mind.

    Saturday, July 19, 2008

    got a message from cherly at like 7 something in the morning when i was still in my beauty sleep asking me to go to pyramid today for a while to get yao yun's birthday present and then go and pick teck wei up to go for group study.

    got up at 10 something and my mum let me go to pyramid and to group study. mana tau teck wei is in puchong with his friends and they are going to watch movie later. teck wei told me to not allow cherly do something stupid. haha!

    so ended up we only went to pyramid. the group schedule is scheduled to be tomorrow. me and cherly went to pyramid nearly at 12. so we walked around and she got herself a pair of heels from eclipse.

    me while waiting for her to change*

    i told her i want to get a top from miss selfridge so we went. and i bought it. and i blardy love it! now, i feel like getting another one from dorothy perkins. shit la... i got no money to buy already!

    bought half of yao yun's present in parkson and then went to diva to get the other half. we really hope you use it and love it. and i bought myself a necklace also. ahah!

    i love those flowers smell in pyramid la. the ones right infront of diva. and it is sooo colourful.

    i love her too much*

    we had a lady to take this for us. she's waiting for her son. the one that is playing the piano. a so nice mum.


    got ourselves stuffs. headed home after getting a birthday card for a friend in memory lane.

    watched she's the man on star movies. i blardy love channing tatum! a freaking hot fella. sizzling hot body and hot face. and nice moves. i love love love channing tatum.

    youu, it is true that i am into youu once again. i hope youu know how i feel about youu but another part of me doesnt. its because i dont want to ruin the great friendship.

    you, i have made up my mind. you are just a random fella who i think that you are hot. nothing more. maybe it was because i had no one particular in mind, thats why i had those urge to see you everyday. it just made me feel that i had someone in mind.

    but now, since i have youu in mind, i wont need you that much anymore.

    i guess now i only have to worry about one. its youu!

    but that is enough to bring migrain to me and also big time emoness.

    music addiction : Westlife - I Miss You

  14. i finally had a break for myself. its a good day out for me. i really needed one very very bad. our plan today was to go and watch hellboy but we changed our minds.

    we watched the dark knight.

    i tell you, that fella that sold us the tickets is a blardy idiot. all together there were 8 of us. we were splited into two different cinemas. so we girls were in one cinema and the boys were in the other.

    the show brought back all my mood. omg man, its damn yeng la!

    christian bale, the batman. he is damn blardy yeng la. seriously very yeng. i like guys in tuxedos. i find them rather hot. he damn yeng la when he kiss the main actress with one hand in his pocket. hahaha!

    the joker is very the scary la. he looks so creepy. omg la. kids see will get nightmares man.

    he did a very good job in the show la. the part where he bombed the hospital he looks so cute. i mean his actions NOT THE FACE!

    rest in peace heath ledger.

    i love the show man. the lamborghini was damn nice la. but bang like that then no more already. its damn blardy yeng. plus christian bale, it looks even more yeng. the show is nice! and shereena likes it.

    the show made me feel alot better.

    met qi hong, ee jun and jenn hsen there also. oh ya.. and wey liam and his friend. i can talk to qi hong absolutely anything man. buy me pair of nike shoes la! hahahaha.

    jia shen was going to fetch yao yun back to kota kemuning. and i was actually suppose to follow loong home but i wanted to visit yao yun's house. so i followed them to kk. the driving was funny la. it made me laughed well.

    yao yun's house is nice and big. hahaha! seriously. we were at this row full of nice houses. i think it is a semi D or something. yao yun said simply pick one house and that is my house.

    i saw this house and keep saying that the house very nice so jia shen stopped right there. mana tau yao yun said, this is my house, open the door. hahaha! damn funny la.

    i tell you yao yun, we will definately come over for sleepovers. and visit you and your mum and your sister. yay! and the way you greet you guards are so funny la my dear. =D

    ferng lin said he wanted to go tim's house to get some dvds from him. mana tau that fella not at home but ferng lin still went and get it from his sister. finally i am actually visiting some friends houses in kk.

    the trip there was good. eventhough it is rather short, i still felt good somehow. maybe because it was jia shen's driving. i love you la js. but you keep on zhat-ing me. thats not what i love about you. hmph!

    reached home safely. ahaha.

    i am seriously craving for more breaks for myself. i am think i am in between two people. but one is fading and one is getting stronger.

    eventhough, when i see youu or when i talk to youu, i act as though i dont care about youu and i purposely talk to youu so rough, i think i am actually hiding something from youu and everyone else.

    i cant help to think about the both of you.

    i agree friends are mainly my everything, but this is another part of me. it will never be the same. friends will remain as very good friends and that wont change. but this, its just different.

    music addiction : Bellefire - Say Something

  15. i can't help myself.

    Friday, July 18, 2008

    i think i am happy on the outside. seriously. i seemed okayy whenever i am with anyone at all. but when i start sitting down by myself i actually dont feel so good.

    whenever i lay my eyes on you, it makes me want to look more. and whenever i did, i feel that second of happiness like really big. but... it makes no different. i am a nobody towards you and always will stay as it is. i am not sure whether that day were you really waving towards me. i doubt too much.

    and thats not the only problem. the other youu, i am starting to think that youu are getting cuter. i may not have the same feelings for youu like i once did yesteryear, but the feeling is definately there.

    can anybody tell me what should i really do?

    i feel like pampering myself with something. i just cant stand on by myself for very long. i am thinking on letting all go but i just dont know how. *screams out loud inside*

    i hate everything and anything at all!

    music addiction : Jordin Sparks - One Step At A Time

  16. no one ever knew.

    Wednesday, July 16, 2008

    can i scream out loud? screaming out loud towards my pillow dont help at all. i need an open space to really scream. i feel like a bomb going to burst out loud.

    i only talk about you to my friends when it is something happy. i think too much when it comes to you. sometimes it jumbles up all of my emotions. i cant tell why i care so much. i cant help but to notice you everytime. but there is always this gap that i know wont get any closer.

    youu, its appearing again. when i see youu, i feel my heart twitching again. the feelings had been going on and off about youu.

    i need a break badly. i am feeling down this few days. can i have you and youu as my birthday wish again?

    my hands are shaking really bad. i wonder is there something wrong with me?

    i need somebody soooo badly.

    music addiction : Kylie Minoque - 2 Hearts

  17. dancing groove.

    Tuesday, July 15, 2008

    finished college at 2 today. supposingly tuesdays is tuition days but today's class was brought forward to last last saturday because of the CT.

    wanted to go and watch movie today but till the end we all couldnt make it. so... came back and laze around the house.

    watched the wade robson project today. after sooo long i am finally watching it again. aiya you know me la, once hot guys are on tv i sure will blog about it one la. i love his dance moves.

    dancers are another hit on my list. but not all dancers are good looking and with good moves. but still dancers which are good looking are just too hot!

    one, makes me think about every second in college. two, makes me feel differently when i am with him. two different hims.

    i feel so into you sometimes. you make me want to look more and there is always this instant effect of me turning into your direction when i hear your name.

    music addiction : Fish Leong - Yong Qi

  18. great classmates.

    Monday, July 14, 2008

    thanks S9 people~!!

    i was suprise to get the present and also that birthday song. hahaha. thanks alot!

    i've always wanted this photo frame. seriously. i love it alot!

    and.. i am still waiting for this spain jersey from my cousins. i think this is only available in places other than malaysia. here only got the red. which alot of people in taylors are wearing. so its not special anymore.

    and also i am looking forward to a new phone. hmm.. i wonder when?

    i havent been seeing you my dearest. the photoframe pictured a day which was rather happy to me cause it was about you!

    music addiction : Carrie Underwood - Ever Ever After


    ich liebe dich <3

  19. its my day. and i LOVE all of you!

    Sunday, July 13, 2008

    treated my close friends with a birthday dinner at the Crocodile Farm Seafood Restaurant.

    the five of us that were there the earliest*

    thats because we were all in one car. chun kit got us there with his avanza.

    chun kit, walter and yew wei*

    michelle likes the fish*

    the other table*

    our table*

    my favourite guys*

    tim with the girls.* he is the model.

    wei ping was the photographer for a while*

    me, qi hong, chun kit and adrian*

    the high school sweethearts*

    our S9. except that jia shen isnt here.

    my weirdest funniest good friends*

    my girls that i LOVE* yao yun, michelle, me, steph and cherly.

    the guys of my favourites.*

    cherly with us s9 (s)*

    the two fella who likes to zha each other*

    lim qi hong, me and en lin.*

    discussing about something which i wasnt suppose to know*

    the darlings*

    my sweethearts and the darling*

    tim. my all time favourite brother*

    me and the guy with a brother called chai yew yew. yew wei*

    we had to leave crocodile farm because they were closing at 10.45. and so it seems we are suppose to go to cherly's house to celebrate somemore later.

    and they were a number of people missing to i dont know where.

    i was in chun kit's car with en lin, jenn hsen and tim. where qi hong, cherly and yao yun was in yew wei's car and steph together with michelle was in adrian's car.

    finally infront of cherly's house at nearly 11 at night.

    in the middle of the road.

    steph and her baby* ahem ahem

    me and michelle*

    the three musketeers*

    talking about i dont know what*

    the gang*

    cherly just running into the picture*

    my loves.*

    our once upon a time pose*

    the wonderers*

    us again*

    tim had to leave. i gave him a hug and thanked him for everything. i tell you, that fella is blardy tall. i was like on cherly's house pavement, a quite high one, and i was just like on the same height as him.

    i know i am short. thank you.

    they were all so facinated with the baby shark in cherly's pond.

    we were actually waiting for jack, liam, sean and my cousin to come. but en lin and qi hong had to go home. so they went back along with yew wei and jenn hsen.

    after that it seems jack they all were here already. and they came in with a lighted cake.

    and there it was, a birthday song for me! for me tau. hahhaha.

    the wish i made.*

    the blowing candle*

    the candles were all so short. i guess it was on the cake for quite a while*

    cutting cakes for the rest of them*

    i was soo damn happy. they suprised me with the cake. eventhough i did know there was a cake coming, but i was still damn blardy happy.

    and i thought khai shien went back. but he was actually with them to go and get the cake.

    it seems that the cake was from fridays and i know it wasnt cheap. soo... THANK YOU ALL OF YOU! I LOVE YOU GUYS!! i heard about how steady jack drove just to make sure that the cake was alright. thanks alot!!

    the cake was good. but my tummy wasnt feeling so well so i had just a small slice of it. but i still have it in my fridge.

    adrian yeong aka kai kai*

    sean siew*

    from someone who i wasnt even close with, to someone i joke around with and zhat-ing each other.

    liam and me*

    he had been a great friend since form 2. and i love him too much.

    i had to leave cause my mum was waiting for me to get home because i didnt have my keys with me.

    i left along with steph, yao yun and michelle in chun kit's car. adrian left at the same time too.

    and... adrian's driving is damn blardy scary. he was all the while in front of chun kit's car but he just stopped the car out of no where. adrian yeong, you are SCARY!

    the moment i got home i opened my presents. and I BLARDY


    its from qihong, jenn hsen, en lin, tim and walter.*

    i love it alot! as qihong said, even its not the blue i love but i still LOVE this bag alot. first, because it is from you guys and second, it is really pretty!

    carlo rino bracelet from my bestie, cherly gan*

    it is very sweet. thanks girl! i LOVE it~!

    the card from my loves*

    and the present from my other besties, steph michelle and yao yun*

    i told steph that i like a belt and they really got me one. and it is sooo pretty! thank you thank you my dearests!

    the card from chun kit and adrian*

    the lovely earrings from the both of them*

    since when you guys got good taste on earrings? thanks alot anyway!

    its from walter and his family. thanks aunty and uncle. and... walter*

    the MNG tshirt from sean, wey liam and jack*

    this is going to be my first stuff owned from MNG. and i love it! i know about the trouble to get the right size but thanks sooo so much!

    the card from yew wei and karyn*

    and the present from the both of them*

    i know yew wei was having a trouble to get me the present. and it seems this was helped by karyn to get it for me. thanks alot the both of you! its CUTE.

    from audrey, wei ping, teck wei, khai shien and felix*

    thanks alot you guys! its from the brand i love and i like the bag. thank you~!

    THANKS EVERYONE! thanks for making my seventeenth birthday perfect! i am happy and touched. thanks sooo sooo much!! i hope you guys liked the food. =D

    music addiction : Gabrielle - Sunshine