ps : i heart you ♥

its getting closer and closer to 8.30 am of the 6th of november. friday morning.

i am dreading so much. i just want to completely skip that moment and never look back at it. i am scared. i lost faith.

my presentation stuff are almost done but my programming assignment? i have a horrible and terrible feeling over it. i am afraid i try too hard and get nothing. i am afraid i try too hard yet i'll go down the drain.

what if i do? the price to pay is too much for me to cope with.

my hands are trembling, my heart is pumping fast, my thoughts are all over the place and the words that i want to say are as though there are glues on my lips that forbid me to utter them out.

i slowly feel coldness on my fingertips and sweat on my palms.

i've never felt like this before over a god damn 15%. never in my life. and i wonder was it really worth putting myself at positions like this over stuff like that.

my days would never be better until friday's uni is over. and then everything will be subsided. i just need that moment so badly.

but yet, i managed to squeeze in some time this morning before i slept to relax for a bit. the one i thing i dont understand about this is that seriously.. when i least expect you, you show up. when i hope and hope and want so badly, you never turn up.

its weird.

but you also brought me some smiles and peace for an hour. and made my next 4 and the half hours of sleep stressless.

i think i'll go to bed early and boost up for tomorrow. i might stay up all night. considering i will be worried and stressed as hell till even i am tired, i will never be able to sleep.

oh god, fast forward the time till friday 1.30 pm. i dont care what happens in between or how i handled it.

good night.

love,
sher xoxo.